|Hand Painted Sun Flower|
I have three cards made now and that is a good thing, have a few more to make but I think I am over the "they may not be good enough" hump. You would think after 30 years of making cards the inner critic would have packed up, but no such luck. I think I know why. For a long time I have wanted to draw my cards, but I had myself convinced that I could not draw. I mean phobia convinced. So I did a variety of things to make cards. I used copyright free images, traced them and then colored them with watercolor markers, I used rubber stamps and colored them. I started going to art retreated in order to learn how to paint backgrounds. I learned how to draw faces (got a little sidetracked from my original purpose) and just did a lot of things. But the nagging inadequacy would not leave.
What has caused me to rethink my abilities, to at least try? For the past year and a half I have participated in ICAD and in a few card swaps. I have participated in a project called love notes where you can make post cards or cards and send them to your pen pal. I participated in Art Doodle Camp and NANOJOMO(national journal month) and a few other things which allowed me to just have fun drawing and painting. Along the way I discovered I could draw, I did have a style and it was fun.
I still struggle with insecurities, but now instead of letting the art supplies sit and gather dust, I am using them. Believe me when I tell you have a 30 year collection of supplies. Bet I could open a store. But that is for another life.
Today was a good day. Have to work on my ICAD #5 and get in bed a little earlier tonight.