Finding My Way

"Many of us feel we cannot draw, even though as children we did."  This quote is taken from a book I just received The Confident Creative by Cat Bennett.  This one sentence says is all for me.  When I was a child, I would spend hours in my room drawing and creating.  I taught myself how to draft a pattern and made clothes for my dolls by hand.  Oh was that fun.  I taught myself to embroider and embroidered baseball themed pillow cases for my brother's room.

I found so much solace in these creative pursuits and for the life of me I cannot remember when it all changed.  I have a feeling it was a gradual progression of inner critic voices telling me that I could not draw, I could not sew,  I could not……  I often sit and think about this and try to figure it out, but nothing comes to me as some great incident other than the fact that I was riddled with strong self-doubt.  I just never felt good enough which is kind of sad because I know that I missed many opportunities because I did not believe in myself.

I have been working on two projects today (pictures to come later).  It took me most of the week to convince myself that I could do them and once I got started, I realized just how much fun I was having and how rewarding it was to at least try.

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and is very subjective.  Plus, and this is really big dear reader, if I continue to spend my time worrying about what others will think, I will never get anything done.  I had to ask myself why I am creating, why I am taking online classes and what do I want to feel at the end of the day.  These are very valid questions that have made me dig deep to see just what is it I want to do?  I do not have the answers today, they will be part of my journey through change/release for 2014.  I hope that I will have some sort of answers as the year progresses.

One of the online projects, Journal52, that I am working on this year had us make a simple journal.  On the cover I put the words OPEN UP which is part of my process, open up and let the creative juices really flow.  I find that I can be very closed and rigid.  Each line has to be just right, no coloring outside the line. Have precise guidelines….I realized where this comes from, I was a trainer, project manager, project analyst for nearly 30 years.  My life was project plans, meeting deadlines and keeping everything on track.  There was no time to plan, what with job, raising children and attending college.  Even when I made greetings cards which I love, I drew a project plan for making cards.  So as part of my year of change, I realized I am no longer a project manager.  My life does not have to be so rigid and structured, I can plan and have fun.  I can mix colors that are not supposed to jell.  I can draw a face with wonky eyes and most of all I can just play.

I think I am writing this today to give myself permission…..permission to really enjoy what I do and to open up to new and exciting possibilities.  There is no picture with this post today.  Do not need one.  I just need to listen to my words, embrace them, love them and live them.

So that is it for today dear reader…..I sure to hope that I follow my own advice during 2014.  We shall see.

First Post of Year

Untitled, a photo by momoo50 on Flickr.

The photo being posted represents week 1 from Life Book 2014. I am going to try and post weekly this year. I have to be more confident in my work and embrace it as a real part of me.

I have many projects scheduled for 2014 and one of them is to continue to work on my art. My goal is to learn to paint faces with ease. Right now I think about it too much and become tentative. Let's see how it goes by December 31, 2014.

Random Thoughts Tuesday - Thoughts of China

I have not been able to really write about my time in China.  The picture above is a collage of some of the pictures I took during the 12 days that I was traveling.  I have an app on my iPad, called PicCollage and it is great for making collages.  But back to my topic.  I have not been able to figure out why I cannot find the words to describe all that I saw and experienced.

I have been asked by a lot of people what it was like traveling to China and the only word I can use to describe it is Paradox.  We visited Beijing, Xian, Chongqing, Yichang and Shanghai.  Each please had it own unique features.  For example, Beijing and Xian are steeped in History; Chongqing has numerous resettlement areas where the governments reclaims land and resettles residents to other areas. Shanghai is a relatively new city and as such it's history is pretty much modern era.  There are 25 million people in Beijing; 33 million in Chongqing and 28 million in Shanghai.  That is a lot of people.  Modern high rises are pretty much all you see in the city proper.  Street signs are in english and  chinese; people obtain cars either by lottery or auction.  Numerous American businesses are in Shanghai and the architecture is very modern.  HOWEVER....you cannot drink the water, you have to bring your own toilet paper, I will never forget the taste of warm Sprite (cannot use the ice).

How can a country that makes most of the products we use; is on the cutting edge of technology; and where tourism accounts for one third of its economy, not have clean and safe drinking water?  My mind is just boggled.  I need to go through my pictures and divide them into interesting categories that I can write about.....but for today it is just random thoughts and collage of some of my favorite memories.

Thanks for stopping by.  It is always great to welcome you to my blog.

Until next week......

Random Thoughts Tuesday-Review of Stencil Girl by Mary Beth Shaw

image, a photo by momoo50 on Flickr.

Today my post is a book review.  I pre-ordered a book months ago that was written by Mary Beth Shaw and it arrived last Thursday.  I did  happy dance knowing that I would be delighted with the contents of my friend's latest endeavor.  However, I need to step back a few years to explain how I met Mary Beth.

Late March 2010 I attended ArtFest as a 60th birthday present to myself.  I actually turned 60 in November of 2009, and sent in my registration for this wonderful Art Retreat as my present.  One of the classes I registered for was taught by LK Ludwig and involved painting backgrounds on paper.  I was very interested in the class because I love paper and wanted to find ways to paint paper that I would use for my greeting cards.  In the class LK let us use stencils she brought.  There was a set of stencils that the entire class literally lost their minds over.  I knew I had to have at least two, one that looked like a cluster of pebbles and one that looked like rows of intricate squares.  LK told us she was using Stencil Girl Stencils and giving them a test run in her class.  We could purchase them at Vendor night.  Oh my, I was sooooo geeked.  So, on vendor night, money in hand I made a bee-line to the Stencil Girl table (so did about 50 other attendees).  The scene was not pretty.  I started out at the front of the table and mid-choice I was pushed way to the back and in a blink, all of the stencils were gone.  To say I was devastated is putting it mildly (did I mention I absolutely abhor shopping in crowds?).  I guess the look on my face must have been pretty pitiful because Mary Beth actually talked to me, asked me which stencils I wanted and let me order them.  From that moment on she had an undying fan.

Fast Forward to today.  Last Thursday evening I sat down with a cup of hot chocolate and opened my copy of Stencil Girl: Mixed Media Techniques for Making and Using Stencils. My initial goal was to read the book in one setting. I quickly realized that power reading would be an insult to this book.  The title says it all  Mixed Media Techniques.  It is divided into three sections.  After the Intro and supply list you will find:  Stencil Art, Stencil Décor and Stencil Fun. 

"Whether you are a beginning stencil artist or an old pro, this book will offer you some fresh ideas to expand usage of your stencil library.  Use this book as a starting point......It is my intent to provide you with inspiration that will spark even more ideas and propel you off into new directions."  This quote from Mary Beth is found in the Stencil This article at the front of the book.  It perfectly explains her purpose.  It is not to dazzle you with pretty pictures, it is to provide you with ideas by generously showing us her process. I am definitely going to try Spray it Again, Sam found on pages 66 and 67.

In addition to Mary Beth's step by step instructions, you will find pictures of stencil projects completed by artists such as Tracie Lyn Huskamp, Jane LaFazio and Joanne Sharpe.

I am not a professional book reviewer.  I have written reviews here on by blog of friends who have written books because I firmly believe that as artists (yes I finally called myself an artist), we must support each other anyway that we can. 

I am new to the art world and yet I have made so many friends who have encouraged me, taught me and inspired me to at least try.

You can visit Mary Beth's website, www.mbshaw.com, to see more of her marvelous work.

Well that is it for this week dear reader.  Have a thoughtful week and thanks for stopping by.

 

Random Thoughtts Tuesday: Work In Progress

Journal Page in Progress

 

I was wracking my brain trying to think of some random thoughts for this week.  It has been a busy morning as I begin to restart my purging project.  I cleaned out and consolidated a couple of large plastic tubs and was wondering what to do with the empty tub.  I decided it was time to start my Christmas box (light bulb moment) and I thought why not use the empty tub to house the items.  What is a Christmas box you may ask?  It is a box where I place Christmas presents as I either purchase them or make them.  This year I am doing a combination of hand made and purchased.  Then I look at the item, think about the family and friends I want to give a gift to and find the perfect item.  It is really a lot of fun and I have not done it in years.

Why start the process again?  It has taken me a year to accept that my life has changed drastically.  I am now living on a fixed income in a very unstable economy.  I really like to travel so I have to do more saving and be wise with my spending.  Plus, I have developed talents that I need to share.

I am a real work in progress, though.  Knowing that I need to be more cautious and actually acting upon it is quite a different thing.  It really takes pushing the ego aside and embracing life in a very different way. Understanding that "things" are not the way to a happy life. 

The journal page above is also a work in progress.  The paint on the page is from cleaning my brayer between uses on my gelli plate,  I was making backgrounds on Deli Paper for inspiration cards that I was making,  I have not finished the page which is a shame really because it has been calling to me for sometime,

Radical Wellness another work in progress, I started this process in May and it is really good.  It's purpose is to be mindful of my self care and really look at how I treat myself and my health.  I have been off track since Mid-September and need to give myself a boost so I can continue on the journey.

Art Doodle Love journal.  I was faithfully working in my journal and now it just sits....I think I see a tear running down its page from neglect.  Another work in progress, one more thing to give some attention,

Oh, I say that I do not have time, which is not true.  I am retired for goodness sake.  I do not have enough, I have too much, Excuses, excuses, excuses.....  So, what is a girl to do?  Take each day and enjoy it, plan something special like Knitting Monday, Crochet Thursday, Jammie Saturday.  Enjoy the process and finish at least one work in progress.

Thanks for stopping by dear reader.  What are your WIP's (works in progress)?

Random Thoughts Tuesday - Weekend Among Friends

Maryann our adventurous photographer

 

 

On October 1st I returned from China.  I was tired, jet lagged and road weary.  I also knew I had another trip planned for the 10th of October.  This trip had been planned for months, actually since January.  It was to be a reunion of the participants in the Adventures in Italy Art Retreat taught in September 2012 by Tracie Lynn Huskamp.  Tracie had invited the attendees to come to her home in Wichita, KS for a reunion of sorts.  We looked for the perfect time and all settled on October 10th through the 13th.

We had such a wonderful time in Italy that we were more than excited to connect again.  Three of us were able to attend, Debbie Smith, Maryann Villavert and Glenda Hoagland.  Tracie was such a gracious hostess.  She simply spoiled us with gifts, food and good company.  Her husband, Earl, was a very gracious host.  Earl was with us in Italy and was more than willing to accompany us on shopping excursions.  Ever patient and smiling as he held bags, listened as we swooned over the most delicious paper and had high tea on special afternoons.

How did we spend our weekend?  First we had crockpot lasagna on Thursday evening (it was tremendous), we opened gifts and just talked and laughed.  Oh, before I forget.  We were also introduced to the children of the family:  Annabelle, the cutest daschund; Beatrix and Millie two rambunctous pugs.  These doggies were so wonderful and full of fun.

 

Crockpot Lasagna, our first Dinner in Wichita - Yummy

Friday Tracie made us picnic lunches and we headed to the Flint Hills of Kansas.  On our way we stopped at the cow pends to take pictures of the prairie, it was fantastic.  Then we headed to the Flint Hills where we foraged for dried fall foliage.

 CATTLE PENS on the road to the Flint Hills

 

 The beauty of the Flint Hills



 

The Essence of the Prairie

 



Dinner on Friday was at Picasso's a pizzeria that specializes in large slices.  Each slice was indeed a work of art and I forgot to take a picture.

Saturday was art day.  Earl made pancakes and sausage for breakfast then we went to Michael's to purchase our shadow boxes.  We also went to the most exquisite Antique Mall to look for ephemera to go into the shadowboxes.  I could have spend days in the Mall, so many good things to see and discover.

We spent the afternoon creating our masterpieces and then went to Strouds for homestyle fried chicken.

Saturday night we all sat in Tracie's studio and talked, planned for 2014 trip to Orvieto and enjoyed a special time of fellowship.

In 2012 we were strangers coming together in Italy to take a class from a talented artist.  On that trip we realized that we were kindred spirits.  October 2013, the friendships were cemented into lifelong artistic buddies, sharing a love for art, history, antiques and beauty.  I know that we will find ways to get together often.  Thank you Tracie for being the catalyst for lifelong friendships and a love of art.

Ramdom Thoughts Tuesday on Wednesday - Making the Most of Life

Today is Wednesday, I forgot to post yesterday.  OOPS!!!!  Anyhoo.  In the past two days two very important things have happened.

On Tuesday I went to a funeral.  My friend Sheryl lost her beloved father in a tragic motorcycle accident.  William Spellman was a very special man and much loved.  I learned that he was born in Michigan which makes him very special to me.  He was a lover of Notre Dame (ok, I will allow him that indulgence), a lover of his daughters and his grandchildren.  He has one grandson, Jacob, who looks so much like him it is uncanny.  

I spent the rest of yesterday thinking about how precious life is and that we have to do everything that we can to make it as pleasant and useful as possible.  I know that William did just this. He enjoyed life to the fullest and his love of humanity is very evident in his close knit and loving family.  I met his aunt and uncle at the reception after the meeting, we had a long and enjoyable conversation.  Thinking of them now smile they lived in Michigan, New Jersey, Florida and currently Las Vegas, they live a great life and were so pleasant.

I came home humbled and resolved to continue my goal to live my life to the fullest.

Today, Wednesday, I had my annual checkup with my breast surgery oncologist.  Leading up to the visit is always a little nerve wracking as you do not know what the results of the mammogram will reveal.  Thankfully the mammogram was clear.  No change in the past year.  Thank You Lord.  I have been on this journey for 2 years.  My last Radiation treatment was October 11, 2011 so I am coming up on my 2 year anniversary.  Again my thoughts moved to making the most of the time I have left on this earth.  I sincerely believe that having a positive attitude and doing the things that you love have a very healing affect on ones life.  At least in my case it is working.  I find that my desires and needs are changing.  I am in need of slowing down so that I can truly enjoy those things that mean the most to me, what I find is becoming my passion.

Dear reader, tomorrow is not guaranteed.  What you do today may be that last thing that you do, what do you want it to be.  you may not get a chance to say I love you tomorrow----say it today.  You may not be able to forgive tomorrow---forgive today.  You may not be able to say THANK YOU tomorrow--say it today.

Dear Reader, Love, forgive and say thank you....do not put it off any longer.

So...I love you, forgive myself and say thank you for stopping by.

Random thought Tuesday blessings

image, a photo by momoo50 on Flickr.

I arrived home today from a 12 day trip to China. The image posted today is of a portion of the wall that surrounds the city center of Xian, China. The wall was built thousands of years ago to protect the city,

The thought of today is that last week I was in China and today I am home. How blessed I am. It is going to take a while for me to process all that I experienced. There is so much to tell. So many pictures to review and edit. Thus photo was taken with my iPhone.

There will be mane more posts over the course of the next few weeks. I think this trip has changed me. I have so much appreciation for my life and all of my experiences.

China trip 2013 travel journal

China trip 2013, a set on Flickr.

Wanted to post copy of the journal I will be using on my trip. Let me tell you this is the first thought I had for a journal. I purchased it in February at An Artful Journey vendor night from Jane of See Janr Run.

I agonized over what to use for weeks. Last night it came to me, use the book you see, it is light weight, colorful, has the paper I like, envelopes to collect data and 4 sections that will capture each segment of this adventure. I am so excited.

Random Thoughts Tuesday: On the Road Again

The Willie Nelson song is floating around in my head.  I am getting ready to leave Sept. 18th for the trip of a lifetime.  It seems so weird to me, but it is so true and I am so blessed.

I am going to CHINA.  Just typing those words gives me chills.  Never in my wildest dreams would I have imagined that I would be able to do and accomplish many of the things I have done in my life.  If you ever want to see evidence of the Lord working in someone's life, I am the poster child for it.

In the past 19 years I have been to France, Italy, Hawaii, Switzerland, Monaco and many of the Caribbean Islands.  I have seen many of the states in our own country, I have taken train rides through he Rocky Mountains, through the Alps, through New Mexico and the Appalachians of West Virginia.  I have been to Art Retreats in Port Townsend, Washington, Los Gatos California and Orvieto Italy.

I have saved and scraped to be able to have these adventures and it has been so worth it.  I smile as I write these words because I know just how special this time of my life is.  I have no complaints only many thank you's.  Life is short, so it might as well be interesting.

Yes I am on the road again, looking at the wonders of the world.  Hey, wouldn't it be cool to make pilgrimages to see the 7 wonders of the world?  I mean really.......

Not sure if I will be able to post while I am way, but I will try.  If not, I will definitely post when I return.

So for now, Life Book 2013 and 29 faces of September are on hold until I get back.  I will be capturing the beauty with pictures and in the deep recesses of my mind,  I may even try to sketch a bit (not sure how that will turn out).  But one thing I do know, I will soak up as much as I can.  Wrap it up in my spirit and return home with a new zest for life and love for all of God's creations.

Well time to hit the road....later, Pilgrim

Day 13 of 29 faces challenge - Photo Friday

Day 13 of 29 faces challenge, a photo by momoo50 on Flickr.

I have been participating in a project called 29 faces challenge in September.  I have been posting faces daily.  Some have been recently drawn and some were drawn earlier this year.  I have learned a lot and been working on art daily.  I think I am improving, but there is still along way to go.  Having fun with the process.

Inkblot butterfly week 37 life book

Inkblot butterfly, a photo by momoo50 on Flickr.

This mixed media painting represents harmony, my word for the year.

Random Thoughts Tuesday - No thought at all

Sometimes there just are not any profound thoughts or words coming forth.  There has been so much going on in the last few days, friends diagnosed with Cancer, the world on the verge of war, Civil Wars in the middle east so much pain, so much confusion, 

I just need a space with some quiet, some space with a little peace.  Sometimes I wish everyone would just go somewhere, sit down, shut up and PRAY!!!

That is as random as I can get today.

Photo Friday - this week in art.

Day 6 of 29 days of faces challenge

This painting is based on  lessons from Mindy Lacefield.  The face is very simple.  It is drawn on an index card (I was participating in the index card project sponsored by Daisy Yellow).  In trying to find my voice, my artistic voice, I find that I like simplicity and a bit of whimsy.  Yep, that is just me.

Day 5 of 29 faces challenge.

Day 5 of 29 faces challenge., a photo by momoo50 on Flickr.

The drawing today was done with Paper 53 a drawing app on my iPad.  I am trying to learn to do digital drawing.  It is just fun.  I find that I am wanting to experiment more with my art.  I am becoming more comfortable in my artistic skin.  This week I have spent two whole days painting, this is a first, but the days were so relaxing.

Day 4 - deep in thought

Day 4 - deep in thought, a photo by momoo50 on Flickr.

Day 3 of 29 Faces

Day 3 of 29 Faces, a photo by momoo50 on Flickr.

Today I am going to be a little boastful.  I love this painting.  I started drawing and painting faces in April of this year and with lots of practice I have come a long way, trust me.  I still have to talk myself into showing the finished product, or even trying, but once I start, it is really relaxing and I do enjoy it.

I still have a lot of practicing and work to do and that is just as it should.  My goal is to fill a sketchbook with practice drawings and note the changes over time.

Thanks so much for stopping by.  

Random Thoughts Tuesday: 2014 plans for Online Classes

2013 has been a very busy year from an online art class perspective.  I have been meaning to write down a list of all of them so I can keep up. Some how I have not done that yet, but I know for sure it is a lot.  Hence the decision to limit the number of online classes for 2014.

While it is a lot of fun to participate in these classes, it is not always wise.  At least this is true for me.  I find that I get so busy that I forget to just try and paint or draw something on my own just to see if I can do it.  In fact I am kind of hesitant to try, but I feel this call to branch out on my own no matter the result.

The picture above was a lesson from Life book 2013.  I drew and colored it while I was on the train, as a result, I had to vary from the lesson just a bit and it was great.  I felt empowered.  I also participated in ICAD from Daisy Yellow,  it was a free project where you drew or painted on index cards using a prompt or a suggestion of a theme.  This was a hoot to do because I was left to my own imagination as to what I would create and I must admit that some of the cards were really cool.

So, this is my plan for 2014.  I am going to sign up for two (maybe 3 if one just calls to me) on-line classes; participate in the inspiration card swaps sponsored by Jessica Brogan (I love this); Hope ICAD is held so I can participate; designate at least 2 days a week for my own thing.

It will be so interesting to see if I follow through on my plan.  Only time will tell.  In the mean time I will enjoy the rest of this year learning and growing. 

Day 2 of 29 faces

Day 2 of 29 faces, a photo by momoo50 on Flickr.

I like participating in Challenges such as this.  It requires me to be present and work on my craft.  I love the eyes on this portrait.  I have been working to make the eyes more expressive and less like a deer looking at headlights.  They are coming together and I am pleased.  I still have to talk myself into drawing faces, however I notice that I have come a long way since April when I took an expressions online class taught by Regina Lord.  I should practice more and I will.

I have to work on the nose more; that is my next challenge.